Doug came home from hospice respite this morning. The EMTs brought him in the ambulance and a hospice nurse came at the same time. She was very nice and showed me a few things - like propping up the urinal just right and leaving it there under the covers for as long as Doug would stay still. It worked! At least one time.
Before he left the hospital, one of the nurses tried to put in a foley (urinary) catheter. She wasn’t successful. Doug said it hurt - a lot! I can see evidence of that. I had thought if Doug had a catheter it would make life easier for everyone. But that must have been awful - I don’t blame him for refusing.
He is still hurting from the fall. I’ve given him morphine already. He is restless and forgets that he cannot get out of bed. He turns over and tries to get out of bed. He throws his covers off, then gets cold. And he thinks he has to pee, but he already did.
If this is too much detail, feel free to stop reading. This is real life, and it “ain’t pretty”.
I’m hoping he will take a nap; every time I think he’s snoozing, he asks for something - sometimes he’s only half awake.
I’m glad he’s home, where he wants to be. But it’s exhausting to take care of him. Maybe this is what it’s like to have triplets. Never a moment’s rest. I will have to learn to nap in 5 minutes increments. Alone, I can’t do this. I’m trusting God to empower me, day by day, moment by moment.
Most of the time Doug is in his right mind, enough to carry on a short conversation. Other times he forgets why he can't get out of the bed!
Paid caregivers must be in high demand. I’ve found two good ones, but they can’t start for a while. One can give me three days a week starting next week. The other is taking care of a relative until Sept 15.
I have a good friend who lives about a half hour away. She is a retired RN and is very knowledgeable and compassionate. She is my Go-to person that I can call if I get in a pickle; I know she would come.
I’m writing this on my iPad so I can sit close by Doug. Gotta go. I’m back - he was trying to get a leg over the side.
I’m finding that a gentle massage with lotion on his legs and arms helps to calm him.
I can’t imagine how uncomfortable it must be to lie day and night in the bed, unable to even sit on the edge of the bed. I try to reposition him with pillows too.
He’s resting now. Hallelujah!
Doug does recognize people that he knows well. Yesterday friends he’s known for over 50 years came to see him. I think that brightened his day a little. He was grouchy because he wanted to come home! So if anyone wants to stop by and give a quick hello, you are welcome. Just text first.
We have such marvelous neighbors. I cannot even begin to tell all the things they do for us. We are getting cheeseburgers tonight - Doug’s favorite (although he is eating only a bit he will enjoy the taste.)
And friends - I opened my front door this morning and there were a dozen beautiful yellow roses! Our fridge and freezer are close to full.
My verse for today and days to come:
“Do not be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be discouraged for I am your God.
I will help you and strengthen you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10
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